The thought of making blog posts isn’t really very exciting right now, hence the lack of posts. My days are pretty much the same right now. I wake up around 7:30 with Jackson, feed him, lay in bed and try to nap till about 10 with him, feed him, pump, attempt to get him to nap, wash bottles, eat breakfast, feed Jackson, attempt to get him to nap, pump, shower, try to get Jackson to keep napping, feed him, pump, attempt to get Jackson to nap, maybe eat lunch, maybe do homework, feed Jackson, pump again, Jon gets home, try to clean up, do more schoolwork, and then I go to bed around 8pm. And then I wake up two more times at night to feed him and pump. That’s it. That’s life.
It’s boring as hell. I also absolutely hate exclusively pumping. I went to a baby shower this weekend for a coworker and was beyond happy to get out of the house! I was also reassured by all my coworkers with babies who told me that the newborn phase really does just suck and it gets so much better from here. I already knew that, but still nice to hear! However, when I got home, I had to pump immediately and told Jon that I hate pumping. He got upset that I wasn’t “grateful” and only focus on the negative.
Hello. I pump ever 3 hours. For 30 minutes at least. FOUR HOURS A DAY I spend hooked to a milk machine! Then my nipples hurt and are so sensitive that wearing a shirt irritates them. They leak milk everywhere. All over the place! I usually have to keep a cloth diaper in my shirt to absorb all the milk! I get sharp pains in my boobs nonstop. They get full and uncomfortable. If I don’t pump, I get clogged milk ducts that hurt like crazy and decrease my milk supply. My boobs are on my mind 24/7. Sorry I’m not positive about this whole pumping thing, dude. I just keep telling myself that I only have to make it to three months and then I can start cutting back on my pumps! Maybe even to the point of sleep all night long!
Aside from all the pumping hubbub, Jackson is doing well. He was definitely easier as a sleepy newborn, but now he wants to stay awake more and doesn’t really like going to sleep for his naps so much. I can barely get anything done during the day in my many attempts to get him to nap. He doesn’t cry much, but he’ll fuss and unfortunately, he’s too young to let him cry it out yet. No self soothing capabilities at this age. While I find our schedule horribly monotonous and seriously dread every single weeknight where I have to do all of his feeds, I also love his little faces. I love when I go to burp him and he whispers little secrets into my ear, or how when he sneezes he ends with an “Aaaahhhh” that is the cutest thing ever. I love his little hands that flail all over and his cute little hands and feet. I love holding him and having him fall asleep on me. I love when he looks at me while I give him his bottle and he holds onto my fingers or holds onto his bottle too. He really is absolutely adorable while I can’t wait for this newborn stage to pass so we can just feel more like normal people who can actually sleep all night, I also know I’ll miss how tiny he is and I’ll miss the faces he makes and how he fits right on my chest.
The weather has been amazing here in Georgia but I haven’t been enjoying it much! I’ve gone on a few walks, but I feel the need to try and get schoolwork done and by the time I get a minute to myself during the day, it seems like something else comes up. I’ve been wanting to start venturing out with Jackson alone and honestly have just been so busy at home doing absolutely nothing (/caring for a newborn) that we haven’t made it yet.
Tomorrow evening I’m hanging out with Laura though and Thursday, Gina is coming over. Friday, Jon and I head to Florida so that his family can all finally meet Jackson! I’m super excited to get back down to Florida but also nervous about traveling with Jackson. Not even about having him out of the house, but just about trying to keep him on some sort of schedule with kids around and showing him off to family. If he doesn’t get enough sleep, he gets fussy and then he really won’t go down for a nap. So, we’ll see… It may be completely exhausting, or it may just be really nice to get out of the house for a few days since I’ve had major cabin fever in here.
I need to go pump again and maybe go outside for a few minutes before I go to bed. I’m getting tired and want to spend some time with Jon too!